Blogging Before Bed!

I am still amazed at how quickly the week of Christmas flew by and can't really believe that tomorrow is New Year's Eve! For the "big night" (I think New Year's is overrated.) I am going over to Grace and Charlie's apartment, which I am excited about. I have not seen the two of them in awhile, and to me it is the perfect way for me to spend NYE.

I am going to write about some of my favorite parts of break:

Of course there are always the presents (given and received). I was lucky and received a good number of credit card gift cards from parents at work, in addition to a Whole Foods, a Macy's and a Starbucks gift card, chocolates, a "stress free" bath set from Bath & Body Works, a pretty bracelet and Victoria's Secret perfume + a week's paid vacation from my boss. Most of my family members give me money, but with (a lot of) help from me (I made my Mom a list.), I was very happy with my Christmas presents from my parents. I got a juicer, a mixer, a cutting board and a nice garlic press for the kitchen. (Can you tell just how much cooking has become a part of my life?!) The juicer is Amazing! The other morning I made my sister and myself mango surprise: mango, kiwi and carrot juice, and this morning I made a carrot, ginger, apple juice. My GARMIN (GPS for my car) tied for favorite gift. Not only does it get me from one place to another, I can search for restaurants, shopping, public trans, etc. nearby. I also got a lot of socks (typical), a one hour massage gift certificate and some makeup. I think that's everything. Sarah got me a new cookbook: The Complete Idiot's Guide: Vegan Cooking, and Monica picked up a few new shirts for me post-Christmas. :)

I got a lot of people in my family "Between Me and You" journals. I thought they were such a cool idea; I just hope that I get them all back! (http://www.journalsunlimited.com/). From the same store, Flourish Studios (http://www.icanflourish.com/), I bought a lot of my friends rings that support the Putton Project (aka Buttons for Peace Project) in which proceeds go to Dr. Jane Goodall's Roots and Shoots Program. I know I do not have a lot of extra money to donate right now, but I thought it was a nice way to give gifts while being charitable. Picture frames are always popular as are my homemade, organic lavender bath salts. (I just love making things!)

On Christmas Eve I spent six straight hours in the kitchen. For our appetizer Christmas Eve that night, I brought some homemade hummus, stuffed mushrooms and spinach artichoke dip. For Christmas dinner I made a "sweet polenta pie," scalloped corn, an eggnog cheesecake (with a homemade graham cracker crust) and a chocolate bourbon pecan pie. In How It All Vegan, the authors describe this pie as "better than sex pie," and I must say that it was definitely my favorite new recipe! :)


My sister came back to Chicago with me on Saturday. After many days of sub zero temperatures, the drive included dense fog and a lot of pouring rain on a nearly sixty degree day.
We grabbed a late lunch at Pho's Thai Cuisine, which is very close to my place, and then we headed downtown. Isn't it funny how you can never find anything for yourself when you actually have the intention to go shopping? The first part of our trip in Forever 21 was very thorough for me, but as time passed, I was too overwhelmed and could not do it it anymore. After awhile we just relaxed with some tea from Teavanna and awaited for hunger to strike: we were downtown, so we figured we should go somewhere good. In the end, we decided on late dinner at Reza's, which offers Persian, Middle-Eastern,and Mediterranean cuisine. We split an appetizer of Vegetarian Shami (Savory patties of minced green vegetables, coated with chickpeas delicately sautéed, served with delicious sweet and sour pomegranate sauce with finely crushed walnuts). It was very good, especially the sauce, which we both used for our table pita bread. She ordered sea scallops for dinner, and I chose a vegetarian sampler which included Couscous,Tabbouli, Falafel, Hummus, Baba Ghannouj, and Dolmeh. I ended up taking a lot of it home with me.

Alright... my eyes are hurting. More to come later!

Thank God it's Friday!

Since entering the work world, I feel that I have begun to appreciate Fridays even more than I used to. As most of you know, today is not only the last day of my work week, it signals the start of my week-long Christmas vacation!! I head out sometime tomorrow.



While a lot of times I blog about my frustrations at work, I do also have some great stories (like the one when I called Santa), and I want to quickly share a few more with you.



Yesterday the kids were working on their writing by making out Christmas lists. One of the boys told me that he wanted a "tuv." Immediately a puzzled look came over my face, and I asked him, "What's a tuv?" He responded, "a thing that you take a hot bath in." "Oohhh!" I said and went to the chalkboard to spell hot tub for this Kindergartner's list.



Later that day one of the other little boys (4) asked me how Jesus flew to heaven. Initially I froze and did not know how to respond except, "That's a good question!" After thinking for a few moments, I asked him if he knew that there are good ghosts. When he said yes, I told him that it was Jesus' "good ghost," his spirit, that went up to heaven- not his actually body. He was satisfied with that answer and did not ask any further questions. That same child told me that his full belly had a baby in it the other day.

The other day when our class was practicing I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas, one f my students asked me how to ship a hippopotamus. (This boy is always thinking!)

A short errand tonight, some packing and then I just want to relax. It's been a busy week!

I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas

That song did not make the list, but the kids will be singing Jingle Bells, Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer and Feliz Navidad later this afternoon. Then, there is tomorrow and Friday until I have a weeklong, much needed, break.

I have not had much free time recently. Monday night Dominique and I went to a special sneak peek of Adam Sandler's new movie Bedtime Stories. I definitely would not pay to see the movie: it was fun to do on a Monday night, but I was neither of us were that into it. I miss his earlier movies like Happy Gilmore and The Wedding Singer. Last night I took home one of the little girls from the preschool side and babysat her until about 11:30PM.

I want to talk about my Sunday before it's too late. I woke up that morning in time to do a boot camp class at 11. It felt so good because I definitely have not had as much time to go the gym recently as I usually do. Fortunately it was a rather nice winter day, almost 50 degrees! I met Lauren downtown around 2, and we went shopping. I have so many people on my list that it was a bit overwhelming to shop. I did, however, pick up a scarf for one of my co-workers and a Lush bath fizz for Cristy. After some shopping I finally got in a visit with David, Cristy and Parker. It is always so good to see them. Little Parker slept on my lap for most of the time that I was there. I got there aaround 5 and didn't leave until like 10 or 10:30. Before going to bed I made a delicious corn and potato chowder for the week. Homemade soups are the best!

Shoot... My lunch break is over!

If it Weren't for My Friends and Family,

I honestly might consider leaving Chicago. Don't get me wrong, it is a fantastic city, but these teen temperature days are very hard for me to deal with!

It's been awhile since I last blogged because my computer is down again! I think it may just be time for a new one! Friday was my friend/co-worker Dominiqe's Birthday. Since she is new to the city, I wanted to make sure that it was really special. I brought her a a birthday card, princess tiara and white chocolate mocha (her fav) to work Friday morning. Out director ordered pizza and cake for everyone. That night we went to dinner downtown at Quartino (Ristorante, Pizzeria and Wine Bar), which was a recommendation from one of our parents at the school. It is known for authentic Italian pizza and small plates. After our long week we ordered a pitcher of sangria. Then, Dominique ordered grilled organic veal skirt steak, and I got gnocchi with green beans, potatoes and arugula pesto. While we do know each other from work, which we talk about a good amount, is was nice to shift conversation away from work and the kids and talk about other aspects of our lives. We were both tired from the week post-dinner and headed home.

No matter how much I drink, I never feel good the next day. Therefore, it took me awhile to get out of the house on Saturday. I ran a few errands and did a little shopping before I babysat that night in Evanston. The family gave me a little extra for the holidays, which is so sweet! The girls that I babysat for are incredibly easy. The power going out halfway through the night made it a little interesting, but luckily the two youngest ones were already asleep.

Time to get back to work, but I will right about Sunday asap.

Tea inspiration of the day: "Love what is ahead by loving what has come before."

Tea Inspiration

Not only does Yogi Tea have some delicious teas, I like the inspirational quotes that dangle down the side of my mug when I consume it. Today my tag says, "The universe is the stage on which you dance, guided by your heart." To me they are kind of like fortune cookies cookies, except I get them everyday.

Today was a rough, chaotic day for me. I had finally had it at work and broke down momentarily. (By breakdown I am referring to a couple of tears. It could have been worse!) For those of you who follow my blog, I talk about "Anna" a lot. Well, mostly I talk about the abuse I put up with. In the beginning of my job, things were tough. Then, I saw an improvement. Now, I think things are worse than they ever were before. I know she is only four years-old, but I have been physically abused in same way or another for I would guess five days straight. I feel as though I have tried everything with her: bribes, threats, loss of privileges, notes home, talks with her mom...  Yet, nothing seems to change. When you ask her to do something, she often responds with a loud "no!" She merely smiles when she gets into trouble or hurts another person; she throws tantrums when she does not get her way, and the littlest remarks can set her off. While my psych background does not enable me to "treat" her, I definitely believe that she has some sort of personality disorder and needs help. I know most personality disorders are not diagnosed until later, but she reminds me of someone with antisocial personality disorder.

I am not entirely sure why today was the breaking point. Am I frustrated because I feel like I have tried everything? Is it because I know there is nothing else I can do for this child: while she makes me so angry, there is something off in her body? Does my heart break because I am seeing, for possibly the first time, how psychological disorders manifest themselves at such a young age?Is it because I know the group dynamics of the class would be far better off without her? When I arrived at the school, and came face-to-face with her and her issues, I wanted to help her. I do not think she can be helped though. I talked to my director before lunch, and "Anna" has been suspended for the next couple of days. Her Mom does not know this yet, but she will also be told that she cannot return after the first of the year. 

I have watched this little girl one-on-one before. I have been showered with her hugs, kisses and "I love you!"s. She has drawn me pictures and told me countless stories that make me smile, and I am so worried about her future. I cannot imagine how hard it must be to come to the realization/accept that your child needs psychological help. Yes, her Mom is young, single and busy with work and school, but these factors cannot explain why her daughter behaves this way. 

Work has been taking such a tole on me that I was in bed by 9PM last night. I walked into my apartment, sat on the couch with my roommates and only got up so I could pack my lunch for the next day. I did not even eat dinner last night- very out of character! I figured I would wake up early this morning, but I only struggled when my alarm sounded at 6:30AM. I babysat after work tonight, which is where I am now. Luckily, it was an easy night before the little boy went to bed about 30 minutes after I arrived.

From the events that transpired today, I have been thinking a lot about the role of stress in the workforce. Whatever I end up deciding to pursue in my life, I do not want to get to this point where I feel so exhausted (I was supposed to get to dinner with Grace last night but did not have the energy to leave my house.) and end up crying at work. Then I also start to wonder: Is it the transition to the "work world" that makes me feel this way, or is it this job in particular? If anyone has any feedback, I would love to hear it! 

Run Like the Wind

Hmmm... This was supposed to post yesterday (Wednesday).

I had been encouraged awhile back to try and write in my blog every day, even if it is something small. So here is what I've got in about ten minutes.

Today is my Mom's Birthday. My Dad called to remind me this morning. If he hadn't, I'm not sure when I would have realized. I can't shake off how bad I feel about that. I am usually so good with birthdays, but for some reason I did not write it on my calendar. Now I need to find the ultimate gift! I am thinking a nice necklace.

I got my computer back yesterday, which was a relief. My roommates have been great about letting me use their computers, but it is always nice to have your own. This has never really happened to me before, but last night I got the urge to workout late at night. I left my apartment at 9:30 and did not get home until after 11. I felt an energy about me that I never usually feel at night. I was motivated, and after awhile, I felt like running. I am not usually in the mood to run, so I really appreciated the pre-bed endorphins that I got last night fom some sprints. I definitely slept well!

There are only 15 days until Christmas, and I NEED to get going on my gift purchasing. I do not have anything as of yet, I hope to get a lot accomplished this weekend.

I Can't Take the Abuse Anymore!

This is the third day in a row that I have been abused by "Anna." I try to acknowledge her good behavior, so I gave her a sucker when she followed my directions this afternoon. I told her that if she did not maintain the good behavior, the sucker would go in the garbage. Surprise... She started misbehaving. I took her sucker away and threw it in the garbage. She threw her typical tantrum and so I told her to go in the other room so that I could talk to her. As I turned my back to make note of the incident, I felt a huge smack on my back. It was her. I walked her into the other room as the director came entered. I'm pretty sure she's been stressed out lately, but she told me that she is "not going to do this anymore." When Anna's grandfather picked her up, I had to tell him that she has two weeks two improve her behavior. Also, if she starts screaming tomorrow (like she did today), she will be sent home. It was had news to deliver, but I think it was about time. The classroom would seriously be very different, in a good way, if her behavior improved. There was one point today when I did not really know what else to do. We have threatened her; we have tried to reward her, but I think her needs are beyond my qualifications... She needs professional help!

In other news, I still do not have my computer back, which makes updating my blog frequently difficult. I guess I'll talk about my weekend. I babysat in Evanston Friday night. I left work a little early and got into E-town around 6:30. It ended up being a short night: 10:30. I considered taking the train home, but they thought it would be a better idea if I stayed in Evanston. I ended up on Carryn's doorstep, thinking I was going to read a book 'til I fell asleep. It turns out that she got a solid draft of her paper, and we went over to a holiday party (at 1943). It was so nice to see some people that I had not seen in awhile. That is one thing I definitely miss about the "real world": having my close friends so easily accessible. (And I used to think that it was hard to get together with people. It's a whole new world now.)

Early Saturday afternoon I stopped by Camp Kesem's reunion. Sadly most of the kids attended camp this year, which I did not. For those of you who have never heard about Camp Kesem, it is a week-long camp for children who have/had a parent with cancer. I was involved in Camp Kesem all four years at Northwestern and even spent my junior year as a co-chair. Upon arriving back at home I spent the rest of the day baking and preparing for the "Merry Barry Holiday Party" at my apartment. I made carmel corn and fudge and baked some chocolate chip pecan cookies. They all went over well! :) In addition to my goodies, Melissa made red velvet cupcakes, and there was plenty of holiday m&ms, Hershey kisses and rolos. Holiday spirits included "jingle juice," "peppermint patty" shots and "reindeer rum," which was apple cider spiked with rum. For the most part I had a good turn out by my friends, but there were a few that did not come, which made me sad. Here's a special thanks to Anique, Ashley, Marissa and Dominique! For the rest of you... You missed a good time. Once my computer is up and going I hope to have new pictures posted.

I slept in late on Sunday. Once I got up I wanted to go shopping downtown, but the cold weather and slight hangover was a deterrent. I watched the Bears game and laid around. I went to the gym for little while and then made soup for the week (butternut tomato soup) and sweet potato cornbread to go with it. I like the soap; I LOVE the cornbread! :) The best part of my night last night was talking to Kathryn. Oh have I missed her! She makes me feel a little more normal about the way I am thinking and feeling. As I told her about the cooking and baking I've done this year, she suggested that I should offer lessons (as a way to make some money on the side). I would have never thought about it, but I might now... I keep thinking/hoping that there is a perfect job out there for me that I just have not discovered yet. This is big to announce in a public blog, but in talking to her, I realized why I have felt a little out of sorts lately: I am not completely confident, comfortable and happy with who I am/where I am at in life. So as of right now I am trying to figure that out- big goal! It's kind of a pre-New Years' resolution. She suggested that I try to write down things that I am grateful for everyday.

This morning I made the list on my way to work. I am grateful for:
1. being able to hear Christmas music (and dance to it in the morning when I wake up)
2. my apartment and the job I have to help me pay for it
3. my roommates, my friends and my family
4. technology that allows me to keep in touch with all of these people
5. the ability to read
6. food and the ability to eat it
7. public transportation: while it is not the most reliable, it gets me from place to place
8. sunshine

I felt so positive going into work this morning. I just wish it would have been a better day. Tomorrow's a new day. :) Now for a movie with my roommates.

To be 4 Again

Oh my gosh. I am still laughing. I am in the breakroom for my lunch. but just before one of the girls in my class was not sleeping and giving me attitude. After already making the threat, I told her that it was time for me to call Santa Claus. I get out my cell and am trying to keep a straight face, as Dominique sits not far from me, and I pretend that I am talking to Mrs. Claus on the phone. I tell the girl in my class that Mrs. Clause thinks she should have one more chance, but if she acts up again, I should call the North Pole back. I almost blew it (laughing) a few times. I think all of the kids are a little off from the holidays and not being in school since Wednesday, or earlier for some.

The rest of my break was pretty lowkey. On Friday morning I got my massage at 8:30. There was definitely some tension in my neck and shoulders, and both parts were a little sore on Saturday. Once I got home, my Mom, Monica and I grabbed lunch (at Mary's Market) and went out for a little shopping. We weren't too crazy. Monica needed a new winter jacket. She also got a scarf, some perfume, a few shirts. I got a couple pairs of Bearpaws and some earmuffs. That night we went out to dinner with a friend of the family, the Laisures, at a place called Fiesta Cancun. I was a little skeptical because there used to be a Wendy's in the building, but my vegetable fajitas were delicious! It wasn't your traditional peppers and onions. There was also broccoli, carrots and cauliflower. On the side I received rice, refried beans, guacamole and lettuce. (If I wouldn't have been so hungry that night, I probably could have gotten 3 vs. 2 meals out of the one order.) After dinner Monica and I watched there little boy , Joseph, while his parents visited someone in the hospital.

Saturday was finally my chance to sleep in: til 12:30 that is. :) Obviously I didn't do much that day: went for a run, spent some time at my grandparents and chilled with the fam before I took an 8:30AM train back to Chicago yesterday. Last night I really BABYsat: Gavin is 3, and his brother Grahm is only 6 weeks old! I don't think I've ever watched someone that young. I knew this going into it, but Grahm is a fussy baby. He likes to be held a lot, which I don't really mind. It was just hard to play with Gavin, clean-up, eat my dinner, etc. Speaking of... They left my money to order dinner. I didn't feel that hungry/didn't have a lot of free time with a crying baby, but I knew they would give me a hard time if I didn't order any food. So I called in an order. I told the man on the phone to have the delivery man dial the apartment, and I would buzz him up. Well, the delivery man called me and told me that there wasn't a buzzer. I thought that was odd, but I wrapped crying Grahm in a warm blanket and went downstairs, not realizing that the foyer door was going to lock behind me. Plus, there was no delivery man in sight. Thank God for the buzzer system, or the random neighbor wouldn't have been able to let me back in. Trust me, I was freaking out a bit! Once I got back upstairs, the guy that took my order called again. I ended up having to go back downstairs. I put a newspaper in the door and luckily got my food. The vegetarian couscous was delicious, just a little difficult to eat with a sleeping Grahm in my hands. He did not fall asleep until 9:30. I walked around with him for awhile until he was really out of it, then I sat down, and he slept in my arms until his mom got home. :) I definitely gained a lot of respect for new parents!

I have a feeling this time leading up to the holidays is going to fly by. It will be good though. :)